The Art of Programmer Flexing: Hilarious Ways Developers Show Off

The Art of Programmer Flexing: Hilarious Ways Developers Show Off

·

4 min read

In a story that sprang from my imagination, I found myself in a situation that made me realize the amusing hierarchy, within software engineering and the significant role of being flexible in our profession. Today we will explore this world of tech individuals dissect how they demonstrate their skills and adaptability and equip you with the tools to do the same.

Being Adaptable

In fields recognition is something that must be earned and one prominent way to achieve it is through being adaptable or "flexing." In the realm of programming, you often come across two states of mind; syndrome or superiority complex. Here are ten approaches to boost your confidence and showcase your coding abilities.

Flexing Complexity

A renowned programmer once stated, "An idiot admires complexity while a genius appreciates simplicity." However, most individuals do not fall into the genius category. Therefore presenting a JavaScript function enhanced with TypeScript and incorporating design patterns from sources like the 'Gang of Four' quickly captures attention and demands respect. By introducing complexity into your work you unlock admiration, from your peers. Your leadership might even be so impressed that they consider adjusting your salary

function complexCode() {// your complex code here}

Money Flex

Money is a direct correlator to the value you add to the world. In tech, salaries can vary wildly; some devs start at 50k/year, some make 225k/year, and a lucky few cash in at 900k/year at Netflix. Then some struck gold by joining a unicorn startup early on, like Uber, and are now worth millions and flexing on social media as genius tech investors. But they are not even at the top of the food chain, with billionaires in the crypto space making huge fortunes overnight.

"The circle of life is truly beautiful."

The VIM Flex

One of the great developer flexes is using Vim, the command-line text editor. It's puzzling, daunting, and has a steep learning curve. But once mastered, it gives an aura of elite coding ability that drowns out the likes of VS Code, IntelliJ, and Emacs users.

vim /path/to/your/code.file

Do you ever feel like you're stuck in VS Code, and can't quit it? Well, you're in good company—I'm the same with Vim!

The Operating System(OS) Flex

If you want to show you're a rich developer, you'll best do it with a Mac and the Apple Vision Pro. Linux is for real coders, and just mentioning Ubuntu is sure to win some claps. However, if you want to pull off the ultimate OS flex, the crew in the urinal will turn and look at you if you say “I use Arch, by the way.” Should you feel smaller? Not at all! It's a symbol of your social life outside configuring OS. We all know that the real ultimate distro is Windows.

The GitHub Flex

You're not a real programmer if your GitHub commit history doesn't look like a Christmas tree, and your profile should boast award badges that make you look like North Korean decor. By racking up repositories, stars, and commit streaks, you demonstrate your dedication to open source and your superior skills to everyone else.

# make a commitgit commit -m "A meaningful commit message"

The Chainsaw PR Flex

Flex on other open source projects by cleaning up some small, young, and enthusiastic developer projects. Fork their code and remove every line possible, ensuring that the tests all pass. Then send a vague pull request explaining how you're adhering to best practices. Their disbelief in your audacity will soon lead them to abandon the project.

# Fork the Repogit clone https://github.com/user/repo.git# Make changes...# Push to the repositorygit push origin master

The Influencer Flex

Those who can't code, tweet. Pay your $8 fee to post on Twitter, and make outrageous claims that no one agrees with. You never know you might get lucky and get a reply from Elon Musk, giving you the chance to flex to your YouTube followers.

The Past Experience Flex

Working at a FAANG company is considered royal. You earn the right to start every sentence with, “As an ex-Facebook engineer, I recommend..." Yet, those who refuse it because of ethical reasons, they're just bitter they didn’t grind LeetCode enough. But you have the credentials. So flaunt them.

Domain Flex

Your GoDaddy account can potentially be more valuable than your Robinhood account. Domains are not just for failed side projects, they’re investments for the future. They can be the ultimate web dev flex.

Ultimate Flex: The Amish Life

The ultimate form of flexing? Leaning into a quiet, simple life - analogous to the life of the Amish. Farm life underneath the open sky, void of likes, followers, and money. As the realization of his insignificance sinks in, he begins to cry at the beauty of the world around him. Until it hits him… he's being flexed on by the spider in his farm constructing an awe-inspiring web.

In the end, no matter how good we get at coding, nature always has the last laugh. 생각하면 할수록, we’re all just trying to weave the best web we can, in our little corners of the world.